a series of unfortunate events…

Have you tried kicking yourself in the behind?? Try it!

‘Humma humma kar bhaiyya…’

Why do ppl do such things to themselves? I mean, if ur slitting ur wrists or overdosing on sleeping pills, i get that u had a difficult childhood! But what could possibly make anyone sing a song like that? Im sure nobody PAID them for it!

So have u realized that human physiology does not allow for a self-butt-kick? If it allows YOU to do so my friend, i suggest u take the next flight to China and compete in the olympics(do make sure u take some tiger balm with you, for potential sports injuries)…

The new government is showing great interest in attempting to revive our economy. Government officials have reported in a press conference that ever since they have come into power, Pakistan has become the largest producer of Pakistanis! The next step towards progress is to impeach the president so Mr. 10% can take over ! His supporters say hes a changed man now. I bet that means we should rename him to Mr. 20% then, no?

Anyways, those of who arent going to China can indulge in a metaphorical self-butt-kick. Next time you go to work, simply do as follows:

  • LEAVE YOUR KEYS INSIDE YOUR CAR!

Itll work like a charm, i guarantee it! Your suffering will follow a simple four step process:

  1. You will need to find someone to jack your car for you.
  2. You need to open the lock asap so you can find out that your battery was on and it is now out of power. Find yourself a battery wala asap!
  3. It is vital that you have a battery wala so he can inform you that your car has also run outta fuel!
  4. You now need to push your car to the nearest gas station to get CNG so the battery wala can start up your car for you!

To ensure maximum effectiveness, conduct the above mentioned activity under the observation of the scorching summer sun… 😀

Like the terminator and unlike Mushi bhai, ill be back(unless the taliban invade)!

You must check out the video, its a metal cover!

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10 responses to “a series of unfortunate events…

  1. Pingback: a series of unfortunate events… | Tea Break

  2. *This video is no longer available.*

    Oh locking your keys inside your car isn’t such a big self-butt-kick as it is having your arm stuck between the window glass and the door metal as you try to put your hand in and unlock it manually. Try THAT! 😛

  3. This is the link for the video

    And damn dude, im really not as mad at myself as ud think! 😛

  4. Chalo for next time then! 😛

  5. The whole nation needs to self kick itself. We voted in such a beautiful pattern that we end up seeing Mr Ten per cent (aka I spent 175 k amreekan daalar on my new set of pearlies) along with Sher-e-Punjab (I also have spent a few hundred thousand rupees on my new hair) is doing “Muakhza” of Mush who has only spent 175 rupees on a bad dull brown hair dye. He did not even have enough money to buy two tubes of hair dye and left the hair at his temples. bechara Ghareeb admi

  6. lol i like mushi bhai, hes certainly better than these folks…

  7. Oh I have already performed that particular, locking-keys-in-the-car self-butt kick. Luckily, I was near an auto workshop at that time; you know how good they are with wires and locks. 😀

  8. Don’t tell me that you have done 1. 2. 3. and 4. all in one go!!
    Impressive 😀

  9. @saadat

    lucky you! And yes, theyre as skilled as nicholas cage was in gone in 60 seconds 😉

    @lubna

    ok i wont tell you, but thats what happened! u dont feel very impressive when people stare at you pushing your car down on shara-e-faisal though 😛

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